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HypePipe has OLYMPIC FEVER!
And the only cure is MORE OLYMPICS! For the past 189 days we have been drinking Coca-Cola products, watching NBC non-stop, and waiting for the EXPLOSIVE opening ceremony. WHICH POPS OFF IN LESS THAN 4 HOURS! Meredith Vieira has listened to two whole hours of "In Flight Mandarin" and Bob Costas has had his remaining pores surgically removed. It's gonna be a great Olympics!
We're not sure how much of Jesse Camp's hair was used in the construction of the Birds' Nest, but it certainly does look stunning on the Today Show. At this point, the only important detail of the opening ceremonies to end all ceremonies (sorry Salt Lake City) is WHO OR WHAT IS GOING TO CAUSE A DISTURBANCE OF OLYMPIC PROPORTIONS BY PROTESTING THE PAGEANTRY!!!
Will the Beastie Boys parachute into the stadium during the
opening ceremonies in order to help Free Tibet?
opening ceremonies in order to help Free Tibet?
Or will these Chinese girls, taking new pix for their Facebook, decide to "declare
independence" and take their tops off during the opening ceremonies?
HypePipe votes for sexxxy French civil disobedience by hot Reporters Sans Frontières.
Take your temperature- maybe YOU have Olympic fever!
This dog has Olympic fever.
This can of diet Coke has Olympic fever.
This picture of a tank running over somebody has Olympic fever.
Even hula hoops can get Olympic fever.
Woah, these skulls have it... (CUTE!)
These Chinese police ladies do not have Olympic fever.
BTDubs, do Tibetan people have O.F.??? Can't tell! Looks like they want to
stop the Olympics and also beeee in them. OMG, Tibetans be so crazy!
In closing, these are the Top 6.5 Things We Are Fucking Jazzed About The 8.8.08 Olympic Games:
1. PAGEANTRY! (See: Superbowl Halftime Shows, America's Best Dance Crew, Olympics of Year's Past, Madonna)
2. Old bitches who can SWIM. Take a drink every time you hear someone call Dara Torres "old." You will be dead from alcohol poisoning after watching NBC for an hour.
3. Hearing Daft Punk all the time on TV during inspirational sports montages. Harder Better Faster Stronger!
4. PROTEST! (See: Sexxxy French Reporters)
6. The Today Show's twitter account! Meredith, Matt, Al and Ann are tweeting. Hopefully Ms. Ann will get drunk and take the Today Show cell phone from Meredith to give the public some UNFILTERED robot-generated content.
6.5 Did you hear about Clay Aiken's baby?
