Baby Laptops

Baby laptops, built for babies (and perhaps by babies), have caught our attention. Mostly because they can be had for a mere 1oo bones! But also because they can survive x-treme weather and dropping from great heights and African dust storms and they get the internets, like, anywhere.

We are pretty bored with the old model of financing computers and replacing them the second a drop of Sparks enters the keyboard. If they can stream Hype Machine and open gmail, we are GETTIN BABY LAPTOPS!!!!

Thank you Hundred Dollar Laptop man!

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Leslie Feist can’t come to the 4th EVER HYPEPIPE CITY-WIDE SPELLING BEA (ARTHER) either!

BUT SHE SENT THIS FROM A BUS!!!!


Pardon the Kimmel and cometo the Bea!

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First Ever Service Star: NANCY

Ladies and Gentiles, we present to you......

Nancy!

Any scene queen, lesbian, gay, or other that resides in or around LUXURIOUS downtown Greensboro should recognize this spiritual powerhouse. When not being the world's greatest bodega employee, we have no earthly idea what Nancy does. But we're pretty sure it has something to do with saving the world.

So Nancy, here's to you! Your kindness is of a level that has only been achieved by Tina Fey when she created the clip below!

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Do Like To Watch Men Crying???

Heaven knows I do! Maybe not the 2.5 hours of it that I was exposed to last weekend. But a 1 hour weekly session of man tears is more my speed ( and a lot less sad than this), and luckily ABC read my mind is now catering to my sick sick desire with the creation of The Shar Jackson Show!

Imagine one part Starting Over, one part Extreme Makeover (and not the Home Edition), sprinkled with a dash of Punk'd. Sounds tasty right! Add to that a heaping helping of K-Fed's ex and you have my new favorite reason to live for Monday nights. Now there are two other hos (oops, i mean bitches) that host the show but Shar is what really counts. I think I'm obsessed more with the fact that she is getting work, than with her as an actual person.

This past week, I saw her see a man through surgery to have a lump removed from his skull in order to increase his self-esteem right before The Bitches take him to a club and challenge him to get laid. Genius I tell you! PURE GENIUS!

Now they heal the hearts of broken women too, but that's why MJH and MBB keep the Lifetime Network alive. So I fast forward through those parts.

Anywho, I've gone on far too long. Next Monday @ 9pm, buckle down, grab a sparks, some Kleenex, and your lip gloss then prepare to either weep the night away or laugh until you shit in your pants!

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Click It or Ticket Bitches

If you are driving anywhere, buckle up. Memorial Day is always a Click It or Ticket time of year. Be careful- especially those of you who are "country." (You know who you are!)

Anyone who's been on I-40 knows that North Carolina State Troopers do not play! Make sure your insurance is paid up too. And for god's sake, put those empty beer Sparks cans in the trash.

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It Was A Lot Like This:

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