This Week's Kid Nation: We're Terrorized With Love
DO NOT let this show near an airplane! The love that will invariably well in your bosom could cause your heart to explode. We were tempted to let this picture speak for itself in this post because it so accurately conveys how we feel about the residents of Bonanza City. But so much crizazy shit went down this week, we had no choice but to chronicle every second of it as it happened.
Ladies, Gentlemen, allows us to recap yo ass...:
-GREG IS SUCH A LOSER! We are seriously offended by this guy. He's mean, and ugly, and bracefaced -the three traits we hate more than anything in a person (That and also OBX stickers. Oh and being a cat person).
-We think Poor Innocent Little Christian Mallory Babydoll Girl from Indiana said it best: "I hear Greg talking mean out there..."
-Taylor last week: "I'm sorry but you're just gonna have to starve."
Taylor this week: "QUIET! 930 is our curfew! If anyone has a problem with it, sorry, but you're gonna have to deal with it!"
Taylor next week:
-Green team you are gross. Kids your age don't care about other people! They care about Xbox and Hannah Montana and pizza bagels and stuff. We don't buy your whole little wholesome loser schtick. You're up to something Green Team... and we're on to you.
-"Colton is one the toughest kids, one of the bravest kids Ive ever met in my entire life." -Zac, on Colton.
-For real though, Colton is the toughest kid ever. He goes on a vision quest every day and one time we saw him stare down this bull that was gonna try and charge him until Colton's steely eyed glare turned his bovine heart to glue and killed him.
-This week's challenge was soooo complicated. We still don't know how it worked. There were sheep. And cards. And kids. Oh the kids. Running around and shouting and crying maybe and jumping on the sheep. It was a kind of beautiful chaos really...
-Taylor is a Bush supporter. Are we surprised?
-Seriously. Goody Laurel, Goody Sophia. Cut it out. The world is a cruel place. You can't go through it being nice.
-A fucking sandstorm. A motherfucking sandstorm. Can it get any worse?
-OH MY GOD THE WIND KNOCKED THE TOILETS OVER! This is so much worse than before.
-At Town Meeting, Taylor suffers through a public shaming that makes the VMAs look quaint. She deserves it too, royal bitch. She's a pro about it though. What do you do when the whole world turns on you? Apologize. Promise to do better. Move on. (Britney, you could learn something here.)
-Oh well look at that. Mallory got the gold star...
...but only because there weren't any wheel-chair-bound kids or cute puppies around.
